Roleplaying is simply when participants adopt and act out characters that are not themselves. Sexual roleplaying therefore is when couples act out characters with an erotic motivation as part of a sexual fantasy. It can range from being serious with costumes, accents, props, etc. to just being something that is imagined, like being stuck on a deserted island. Practically any role could be involved in sexual roleplaying as long as both people involved are interested. Pretending to be someone you are not can be fun and exciting when done correctly.
Roleplaying can also be good for a marriage as it may be an opportunity for a spouse to ask for something she has always wanted done to her or done for her, but never felt comfortable asking for. For example, in a roleplay where the wife is the dominant person (boss) she might feel more open about telling her husband (employee) that she wants to have her breasts rubbed in a certain way that she had never asked for before. The reduction of inhibitions can be great for a marriage as inhibitions are a killer of sexual enjoyment.
Some roleplaying scenarios are:
* Animal-related where one is treated as a non-human animal such as a dog or pony
* Hospital fantasies involving doctors, nurses and patients
* Stranger-related one or both spouse pretend to "meet" for the first time
* School related - Headmistress and Student or Teacher and Naughty Schoolgirl
* Photographer and Model
* Stripper and Client
* Business related - Boss and Employee, Boss and Secretary
If this is your first time thinking about roleplaying, start with something simple, like Photographer and Model and then move on to ones where the acting requirement is a little higher.
Roleplaying is alot of fun and is easy, but there are a few important requirements:
1. It requires open communication
2. It requires a willingness to participate
3. It requires honesty
4. It requires not taking yourself too seriously
5. It requires establishing rules
Let's examine these requirements in a little more depth.
1. Roleplaying requires open communication - Roleplaying can involve actions that when taken too far, might be uncomfortable for one or both partners. Let's say a couple pretends to be strangers who meet in a bar. They pretend to have different pasts and even different names. As the night continues, the husband begins to feel uncomfortable being called a different name. As soon as he realizes this, he needs to be able to communicate with his wife that he wants to end the fantasy or just be called his real name and continue, or another option he feels comfortable with. Whichever he chooses, being able to discuss that with his wife, even in the middle of the roleplaying, is vitally important.
2. Roleplaying requires a willingness to participate - Perhaps a husband wants to be the boss and have his wife pretend to be his secretary with a German accent. His wife should not worry about whether that makes sense, if she knows what a secretary does all day, or if she has any idea what a German accent sounds like. She should give it her best try and of course, have fun!
3. Roleplaying requires honesty - The husband finds his new doctor very attractive so he gets his wife to pretend to be a doctor and tries to make the fantasy about his new doctor. This is NOT a situation in which roleplaying should be used nor is it the purpose of roleplaying. The husband needs to be honest with himself about his motivations for the roleplaying. He may not need to tell his wife he is attracted to his doctor, but he definitely should not start a roleplaying session with the goal of thinking about anyone other than his wife. All sexual fantasy, including roleplaying, is just a tool that helps married couples increase their sexual pleasure with each other.
4. Roleplaying requires not taking yourself too seriously - In a roleplaying session, the husband might pretend to be an airline pilot while the wife pretends to be a stewardess. Since neither of them have real airline clothing, they make do with what they have. His outfit leaves him looking more like a butler than an airline pilot which could lead him to cutting short the session out of embarrassment. Instead if he is able to play around and ignore the idea that he looks silly, he will probably end up having a great time!
5. Roleplaying requires establishing rules - Similar to open communication, rules are important should something need to change or stop during a roleplaying session. This might be as simple as "no" means "no" or could be something that has been pre-arranged as in a certain stopping time for a specific situation. A couple should always stay where they are both comfortable even if a fantasy heads in an unplanned direction. Also, setting and timing need to be right (as with any sexual encounter). Perhaps a roleplaying scenario was planned for today and the wife comes home from a horrible day at work. A postponing may be in order. Again, the ultimate point of roleplaying is to have fun and enjoy each other.
Examples
Strangers
Acting like strangers is a fun sexual roleplay to do. The set up is easy as one or both people act like they are strangers meeting for the first time. Here are increasingly difficult scenarios to jump start your thinking. Try them out, expand on them, and of course, have fun!
1. Party in the House - Beginner
Setup: Pretend like there is a party going on in your house. Turn on some loud music and dress up like you would for a party. The sexier the better.
Meeting: Pretend to bump into each by the bathroom nearest the "party". This can be "accidentally" walking in on the other or can just be running in to each other near the door. After the apologies for the scare, one party-goer can start hitting on the other. These can initially be brushed off if one is playing hard-to-get or there can be an "instant" attraction. [both options are fun]
After warming up to each other you can dance to the music while talking and "getting to know" each other more. Make up some crazy past and have fun with this. As the night goes on, end up wherever in the house you want and do whatever makes you both happy.
2. Encounter Elsewhere - Intermediate
Setup: Meet at some location outside of the house. Could be a restaurant, a movie theater, bowling alley, wherever. The level you want to take the meeting process is up to you. You can drive together and "meet" as you get there or you can drive to the location separately and enter at different times and even eat at separate tables.
Meeting: At some point during the meal/movie/game, you can notice each other and strike up a conversation. Be extra flirty or seductive. After a fabulous conversation, one of you can bring up the idea of going home together. [For the scenario "home" will only belong to one person] If you drive there separately and leave in one car, make sure leaving your car overnight wherever you met is OK.
This one can be added to by one or both people saying things like, "I never do things like this", and "I just can't help myself around you, I'm not sure what it is".
3. Stay Outside for the Night - Advanced
Setup: Meet at an outside location and begin the same way as the intermediate scenario. The difference is that instead of going home, you actually pay for and get a room at a nearby motel/hotel. Your names and pasts might be made up, but the location will truly be new to you and the fun you have will definitely be real.
These are just ideas to get you started. Use them or make up your own. It's your fantasy!
For an added twist, do one of these spontaneously. For example, if a wife knows this is one of her husband's fantasies, she can tell him to meet her at some restaurant for dinner and then show up after him, "pretend to meet" him, and use a different name. He will get the hint.
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Boss and Secretary
Boss/Secretary is one of the most basic power-based roleplaying fantasies. One person is the boss while the other is the secretary. The spouse playing the boss gets to dictate what happens during the encounter as the employee's job is on the line!
Possible scenario:
1. Going into the office where one of you works and playing out the scenario there. Make sure you will not get caught!
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Teacher and Student
Another basic power roleplaying scenario.
The teacher usually gets to call the shots, but for a twist the student can blackmail the teacher to get exactly what she wants!
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Athlete and Cheerleader
The varsity quarterback always dates the head cheerleader, right? Beats me, but you can always pretend.
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Photographer and Model
This one can be a lot of fun and can provide for some great memories later if the pictures are kept. We recommend a small safe to keep the pictures away from kids.
Basic set up is easy. Usually the husband is the photographer while the wife is the model. Since guys are generally more visual, they are often the photographers.
1. Beginner - The model sets up in a room of the house (whichever is best for pictures).
2. Intermediate - Same idea as the beginning scenario, but is done at another location.
3. Advanced - Borrow a professional photographer's equipment and use it to take the highest quality pictures you can.
Extra - Combine with stranger roleplaying. The photographer and model do not know each other and after taking some steamy pictures, the encounter can really heat up.
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Police Officer and Citizen
This one has a big power element to it. The spouse playing the police officer obviously has all the power and gets to call the shots.
| 1. Beginner - This scenario requires a "bad" cop. Whichever spouse has on the cop outfit simply calls all the shots because he/she can. Any resistance (pretend) is met with threats (pretend). Handcuffing to the bed is a must! |  |
The police officer finds the citizen in his car minding his own business. Even though nothing improper was being done, the office believes that something is wrong and wants to double check. This can start with a frisk and then a handcuffing just because she wants to. The officer can then put the citizen in the back of her car and drive him to the station (home) for a more serious investigation.
